The Joy of Being Selfish with Michelle Elman | #84

Feb 9, 2021

The words, " The Joy of Being Selfish with Michelle Elman | #84" over an image of a fat, femme-presenting person wearing a swimsuit and sitting on a large pink pool floatie, screaming with delight.

Click here to access a written transcript of this episode.

Life coach Michelle Elman is known as the “queen of boundaries” and her new book, The Joy of Being Selfish, can help you ascend to boundary royalty too. Michelle decided to write the book after working hard on her own boundary game and noticing that she wasn’t the only one who struggled with catering to everyone else’s needs before her own. If people-pleasing is your M.O., our conversation will show you why you need better boundaries and how to start setting them. Because you’re worth it, bb!

We discussed:

  • The Scarred Not Scared campaign that led to Michelle’s social media “influencer” status.
  • What inspired Michelle to write her new book (and how she wrote the entire thing during the pandemic lockdown).
  • Why Michelle thinks we should reclaim the word “selfish.”
  • How setting boundaries with people is akin to how you let guests behave in your home.
  • Common barriers that keep people from setting better boundaries.
  • The fear of losing people in your life if you start setting boundaries.
  • The benefits of learning to be alone with yourself.
  • How to start setting intentional boundaries.
  • Why you might want to stop justifying it when you say “no.”
  • What else happens in your life when you get really good at boundaries.
  • The problem with not teaching children boundaries from a young age.
  • How trying to be polite usually equates to having poor boundaries.
  • Why being “difficult” doesn’t have to be a bad thing.

Mentioned in This Episode

Featured in This Episode

Michelle wears a pale green button down shirt. Her brown hair is curled and she smiles for the camera wearing red lipstick with one hand in her hair. A long tendril of a plant can be seen behind her.

Michelle Elman (she/her) is a five-board accredited life coach, award-winning activist, author, and podcaster. In 2020, she was named one of the Top 50 most inspirational women in the UK and is respected globally for her work as a body positivity influencer, best known for her Scarred Not Scared campaign. Michelle’s first book, Am I Ugly?, was published in 2018, and her second book, The Joy of Being Selfish, is out now. You can keep up with Michelle on her website, Twitter, and Instagram, and listen to her podcast, In All Honesty.

Did you benefit from this episode? You can show your appreciation by supporting Michelle’s work. Be sure to snag a copy of Michelle’s new book, The Joy of Being Selfish.

Take a Deeper Dive into the Show

  • The full catalog of Conjuring Up Courage episodes is available to listen to on a variety of podcast players, including Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, and Spotify.
  • Join the conversation with host Shohreh Davoodi on Instagram and Facebook.
  • Sign up for Shohreh's email newsletter to hear about new episodes, announcements, and freebies.

How To Support the Podcast

Each episode of the podcast is carefully crafted with you, the listener, in mind. If you appreciate the podcast and what you're learning from it, there are multiple ways to support it so I can continue to put out episodes for months and years to come.

1. Subscribe, rate & review, and share.
Want to help the show keep growing? First, subscribing to the podcast in your podcast provider of choice is the best way to make sure you never miss an episode. Second, ratings and reviews in Apple Podcasts make it easier for people to discover the show. To leave one, click HERE from any Apple device, scroll down to "Ratings and Reviews", and click where it says "Write A Review" to submit one. Lastly, if you're enjoying the podcast overall or specific episodes in particular, don't hesitate to share with the people in your life or give a shout-out on social media (I love seeing your tags!).

2. Leave a tip.
While the podcast is still growing and without consistent advertisers, the hours of labor I put into producing the show are unpaid, and I pay for editing, transcriptions, and hosting out of pocket. Consider leaving a tip through Paypal, Venmo, or the Cash app to show your appreciation for all the work that goes into putting out a weekly episode:

Paypal: paypal.me/shohrehdavoodicoach
Venmo: @shohrehdavoodi
Cash App: cash.app/$ShohrehDavoodi

Newest Podcast Episodes:

Welcome

Hi, I’m Shohreh!
I’m a self-trust coach, content creator, and podcast host with a mission to help people figure out who they are and what they value so they can come home to themselves.

Let’s team up

To learn more about how we can work together, choose an option below.

Check out the blog

If you enjoy the Redefining Health & Wellness podcast, you may also like what’s on the blog.